It Was Good For Me. Was It Good For You?

May 1, 2011 at 6:18 pm | Posted in Adrian Miller Sales Training, Networking | 11 Comments

(Be forewarned, this may sound like some sort of venting but trust me, I am not alone in voicing this complaint.)

You’ve probably experienced something like this yourself. You’ve gotten together with a new networking contact and are reviewing possible introductions and connections that you can help them with. The introductions are with other “connectors” and referral sources and all of a sudden you hear “wow, they would be good for me.”

There’s a pause while you wait for them to elaborate and perhaps explain more, namely how they, in turn, can benefit the person to whom they would like an introduction. But nothing follows.

Seems simple right.

When I make an introduction (and believe me I do scads of them) I am always thinking about the reciprocity that can ensue and I don’t mean the reciprocity for me.

No, I’m more interested in how it’s going to work between the people that I introduce to each other. Will there be mutual benefits or will one of them simply see the other as a treasure trove of contacts without, in fact, returning the favor. It is after all, as the cliché goes, a 2-way street.

But many networkers don’t see it that way. They ask (sometimes even expect) introductions and they can’t seem to get beyond WIFM (what’s in it for me). Selfishness rules.

So I’ve gotten very wary and when people say that they’d like me to make some introductions for them I always ask “why” and when they explain that these intros would be “good” for them, I, in turn, ask if they would be good for the other person as well. Do they have introductions and contacts that can benefit these new connections because if they don’t, it may not be an introduction that is well received.

When I make introductions I always want them to be good for everyone so please be sure to tell me if it was good for you. The feedback will help and can only serve to make it better the next time.


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